I Can Change
by kymm
Summary: About Voldemort. I meant this to be humor, but...didn't turn out that way, really. Kinda weird. Please review.


Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from anything, J.K Rowling owns Harry Potter and Co., and Comedy Central (?) owns South Park. I think. I just used one of the songs off their movie soundtrack.   
  
Rating: PG13   
  
A/N: Upon listening to my brother's South Park Soundtrack, I got an inspiration for a SongFic...I think that's what things are called, anyway. If you know the song, you'll notice I've taken out most of the swearing, to make it appropriate for a PG level...  
  
I Can Change! (Voldemort's Plea)   
  
Lord Voldemort was in disguise. Not unusual, for he didn't want to be seen, or recognized, by anyone on the streets of New York City, New York. Perhaps he would be yelled at, or even jailed, by the guards and police that roamed. Well, who knows, there might be Wizards around...   
  
For 14 years, since he had lost all of his powers, Voldemort had been in hiding, different disguises. The wizard community was obviously blind. They, in 14 years, had never spotted him in the Muggle Community. If he were them that's where he'd be looking.   
  
Well, anyway he was heading towards the Café were he always sang gigs on Friday nights. Well, he did need a career, evil or not.   
  
But lately, his managers were disappointed. He hadn't found any new songs to sing. If he didn't shape up, they'd fire him. Voldemort was really, REALLY going for a new image, of not being evil, so he hadn't, and didn't have any intentions of frying their brains.   
  
Well, maybe he did have intentions. He was evil, or was, or is? He wasn't sure what he was. But, tonight, he wanted to show that he wasn't evil. That's when a sudden idea hit him. If he wanted to show WIZARDS that he could change, why the heck was he going to a Muggle dinner? Oh, yes, he should go to the Leaky Cauldron, and sing to the wizards! And then, he'd reveal his secret identity. He couldn't show it at the start, or they wouldn't listen, they'd just haul him to Azkaban or something like that.   
  
Voldemort snuck behind a tree, and apparated to the entrance of the Leaky Cauldron, to start his wondrous plan.  
  
  
  
  
*****  
  
About 2 minutes later, Voldemort was walking into the Leaky Cauldron, ready for his performance. After his many years of bumming in Muggle Society, he had learned many lyrics of Muggle Songs. He had just recently discovered this, and got his point out excellently.   
  
His point was that he could change, he could change. (It's true! It's true!)  
  
Well, anyway he walked into the Leaky Cauldron. He walked up to the bartender, and said, "I'd like to book an act, if you please."   
  
The bartender replied, "Of course. The stage is free, sir."   
  
Voldemort smiled weakly and walked up to the stage. He magically made his voice louder.  
  
"Attention, everyone?" Voldemort said. Everybody looked at him. "I have a song to sing, if you care to listen." Some people grumbled and returned to their beer drinking. For the most part, people looked at him like he was some kind of loony.   
  
He sighed, and started his song:   
  
"Some people say that I'm a bad guy.  
  
They may be right, they may be right."  
  
Voldemort knew that everybody thought he was a meanie. He maybe, but...he could CHANGE.  
  
"But it's not as if, I don't try.  
  
I just screw up, try as I might."   
  
Well, believe it or not, he did try. Really hard. To look like he wasn't evil, and to try not to be evil. Well, when he killed Potter's parents, he was only trying to teach them how to create Florissant green lightning. It had backfired, and shot into their faces, killing them. He TRIED to tell people that, but NO nobody believed him. He had only screwed up! People are so forgiving...  
  
"But I can change, I can change!  
  
I can learn to keep my promises I swear it!"   
  
Even though he was trying to change, he wasn't good at keeping promises. But, he could change, he could change...  
  
"I'll open up my heart and I will share it and emit it. I will be born again."  
  
Believe it or not, Voldemort did have a heart. And he would share it. He was tired of being so evil. But he really wasn't...well; maybe he was, but...  
  
He could change, he could change...  
  
"Yes I can change, I can change,  
  
I know I've been a dirty little *******...(any better words??)  
  
I like to kill, I like to torture, yes I'm insane but it's okay 'cause I can change!"  
  
He could make up for things done wrong in the past. He already was, by making this public apology! People should see that he is trying to be nice, and not evil! Well, if you think about it, he was rather insane, thinking that he could overthrow Dumbledore, and Hogwarts. That was an insane idea. And murdering those innocent people! But...  
  
"It's not my fault that I'm so evil.  
  
It's society!  
  
Society..."  
  
Well, perhaps the reason he was so evil in the past wasn't society. Well, actually it wasn't. It was this reason...  
  
"You see my parents, were sometimes abusive.   
  
And it made, a jerk of me!"  
  
Now that was the correct reason. His father had left him when he was a baby, just because he was a wizard. Whenever he thought about that, the more he hated his father for abandoning him.   
  
"But I can change, I can change.  
  
I can learn to keep my promises, I know it!  
  
I'll open up my heart and I will share it and emit it. I will be born again."  
  
He knew he could do it. If only people would let him, and not think he was going to try to kill someone.  
  
He ended his song. The audience clapped, but looked confused. Voldemort thought vaguely of showing himself, but thought better of it. He felt too sad at the moment to do that. After all, he'd probably just get arrested.   
  
Instead, he just said, "Thank you." And walked off stage, feeling mighty depressed.   
  
But he could change. And he knew it.   
  
THE END   
  
Well, this had meant to be more humor, but. I like it, and think it applies to Voldemort really well. Maybe he really isn't evil on the inside. (That reminds me of Star Wars...)  
  
Please review!   
  
  
  
  
  
  



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